Approximate Release Date: December 2, 1992
It probably doesn’t surprise anyone to hear that Chester Cheetah: Too Cool to Fool is not a great game.
After all, this is the kind of game people think about when they think mediocrity in the Super Nintendo era. Too Cool to Fool is a one-button platformer designed to sell Cheetos to children. It’s as bland and soulless as you’d expect, wrapped up in the weird fake rebellion of the early 1990s that mascots like Bart Simpson and Sonic the Hedgehog pulled off but no one else could.
Too Cool to Fool could be much worse than it is. Being boring is about the worst sin the game commits. You control the slow-moving Chester Cheetah – the options menu mentions a dash button but it doesn’t seem to work – on his quest to recover the parts to his beloved motorcycle. I think. The opening text advances way to fast to read! I’m missing important plot information!
The most disappointing aspect about this game is that it’s just not bad enough. You jump on enemies, collect coins, move to the right … and it’s playable. I’m not wrestling with the controls or finding the game difficult at all. It’s all very uninteresting. So uninteresting that the first stage’s boss just up and pulls a Poochie instead of fighting you.
If it weren’t for the fact I got stuck in stage 2, I might have coasted through the entire game solely on inertia. Could I have looked up how to continue? Of course. But Chester Cheetah: Too Cool to Fool doesn’t inspire that kind of effort. I’m amazed I was able to write 300 words about the dull game.
Tomorrow: Do we still have a lingering World Cup Fever? It’s Goal! time!